Now that we are on the cusp of re-opening California, it is time to reflect upon the past year. No parties, gatherings, restaurants, movies, concerts, weddings or libraries. It was largely an introspective year; cooking, biking, reading, hiking, gardening, hobbies, projects and personal growth.

Much will remain with me for the ensuing years as we enter this new phase. Coinciding with my retired neighbor (ex Wall Street veteran) with 2 teenage boys, a wife that works, who is now flushed with free time. Previously, he was a daily gym rat which they have been closed. Paul and I would hike many of the Mid Peninsula Open Space District 26 preserves in the Bay Area. From Bear Creek Redwood Reserve, Fremont Older, Picchetti Ranch, Rancho San Antonio, Steven’s Creek, Russia Hill Ridge, Mount Umunhum and over to Mission Peak in Fremont. Many of the trails are filled with poison oak in the summer, fallen tree limbs, rocks and tree roots breaking the surface as we pass through.

My approaching 70 years of age and Paul, a healthy 55. My stamina is not as in previous years but quite acceptable. Many of our treks were challenging and by conclusion, I was spent. All the while, Paul was eating up the terrain with ease. We always kept a good brisk pace.

It was not at all surprising that I traversed up and down these Mid Peninsula Preserves but my hiking buddy has Macular Degeneration of his eyes since his late 40’s. He can only see shadows with little depth perceptions. Yet, it was always I that weaken or occasionally tripped on the trails but never him. Often times, he would assist me with an arm to get to the top. I am his eyes and guide on these hikes. The appreciation and of each hike is unique with the added dimension of needing to convey the views to my hiking Buddy; the sky, horizon, trees, ravines, hidden dangers on the trails, meadows, cloud formations, animals, flowers, etc., all that we encountered of which we normally take for granted, is now looked upon, analyzed and translated by me.

This makes for smelling the roses even more. Our love for nature, camaraderie, friendship, and conversations makes for the best of hiking partners. Most handicapped people would reside in their homes but not my friend. A hiking Buddy and good friend to boot is a good combination to have. With the upcoming re-opening, we are off to see the Giant’s/A’s game come the end of June. 

“Every day is unique and special”.

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1    A Happy Birthday Greeting from my Dearest Cousin, Ah Millie, from Switzerland :

  ” With so much love, and untold amount of fondness..xxxxxxxxsqueese ”  

2    James Luce and Amalia Pellegrini discovered the term “Friendshipology Friends

“友学 学友

3    Cousin Robert, Yu Zhenguang, son of Li Yun-Shan in Li’s Family K2 Branch -from Shanghai – 坤二房  – 俞真光 – volunteered to be one of our Li/Lee Family Connectors

4    An Amazing Discovery while addressing my Andover Classmates at our 70 th Reunion ( a Zoomed webinar ) .

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This is Part II following Catherine Zhao’s Part I – “ABOUT FRIENDSHIP” posted Jan. 2021

There are people you meet that change your life. There are people you meet that change your perspective. There are people that do both.

Catherine Xiaolin Zhao is one of those people.

I met Catherine in the late summer of 2016. I was fresh out of college and living in NYC. I was full of excitement and fear. I grew up in the Midwest in the United States and hadn’t traveled very much. I felt so overwhelmed by NYC, but I was in awe of it as well. As a kid who once lived in a house that was surrounded by cornfields, I was amazed at the amount of people, places, and cultures in the “concrete jungle.” I was eating alone on the back patio area of Webster Apartment, a wonderful place in midtown Manhattan that provides safe and affordable housing for female professionals, when we met. As an introvert, I remember wanting to quietly eat when along came a chatty and friendly person who ended up becoming one of my best friends. She asked me questions about Oklahoma, and I asked her questions about China.

When I was in elementary school and living in the above mentioned farming community, my family briefly thought we might be relocating to China for my father’s job. I was beyond thrilled. This was right before the Internet started slowly becoming a part of our daily life, so I had to grab the “C” labeled encyclopedia to read up on China. Sadly, we didn’t end up moving there, but my passive yet strong curiosity about China remained. I ended up growing up mostly in Oklahoma.

Catherine knew about the famous musical Oklahoma. Meanwhile, I didn’t understand what Chinese New Year’s really was, and wrongly thought sushi was a popular dish there. Afterwards, I remember calling my mom to tell her that I had made a new friend from China. Over the next few months, Catherine and I, along with some other women, played the role of “tourist” in the Big Apple. Those few months are filled with some of my favorite life experiences. I grew a lot as a person. Being around so many women from so many different countries gave me a different perspective on how America is perceived, in both positive and negative ways, abroad. It made me think more critically about America’s healthcare and college education system. It was such an eye-opening experience in so many ways.

One of the darkest and most surprising moments for me happened on a city bus. Catherine, our mutual friend from Germany, and I were on our way back to our apartment after a fun and adventurous day. Mere seconds after finding our seats, an older woman grew visibly upset that she was having to sit near Catherine. She angrily muttered something as she moved to a different seat on the bus. I was shocked. I couldn’t tell if Catherine had noticed or not. I wanted to say something, but I didn’t know what to say. Was this gross and uncalled for interaction a common experience for my friend? Then I got mad at myself for my own naivety towards the situation. One of my greatest hopes for our present day and future world is that the hearts and minds of hateful individuals begin to soften and open. That they begin to embrace,respect, and love other people and cultures.

Tragic and horrible events continue to teach me the injustices and hate that the Asian community continues to face on a daily basis in the United States and abroad. My sweet, hilarious, and brilliant friend is so much more than a statistic, but every time I hear of violence or racism towards Asians, I think of her. I think of her family. I think of her heart that is so full of love and joy.

May all hearts be more like hers.

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Shaynee Sherwood lives in Kansas City, Kansas where she teaches at a private school that specializes in helping students with learning differences. As someone who is dyslexic herself, Shaynee is a strong advocate for the neurodivergent community. In her free time, Shaynee enjoys writing, yoga, and learning more about herself and the world.

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My dearest older cousin, Millie Yung, and Sister Linda were friends at St. Johns University, Shanghai. Linda was Ms. Linda TSAO then, so I would cheerfully address her “TSAO GA JIA JIA“ in Shanghainese.

Since Yuelin Yang became a FF Brother, his Mother naturally became my “YANG GA MM MA”. But, by FF Fraternity’s simplistic logic “ All immediate female relatives are “FF. SISTERS”.  So in FF circles, she automatically became my “Sister Linda”.

But since Sister Linda is my most admired old friend and colleague from The 199O Institute, I sometimes salute her “ AMBASSADOR YANG “ for her prominent role as the U.S. Ambassador at the ADB (Asian Development Bank – appointed by President Bill Clinton – 1993-1999 ).

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I first want to take this opportunity to thank “Sister Linda” who in 2003 helped arrange an opportunity for me to visit UC Davis’s Mondavi Center for Performing Arts ( one of the best acoustical chambers in the U.S. ) – as I was trying to persuade Ningbo University ( Ningbo is my ancestral home ) to build a First Class Music Center.

“Sister Linda” treated me graciously with her delicious home-cooking at her home in Davis. To this day, I still remember her succinct advices, her warmth, her fantastic Chinese paintings on the walls, and an unusually large and beautifully bonded book titled: “SUN TZE BING FA. ( The Art of War ).  I was profoundly impressed.

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Many of us already know about Sister Linda’s many spectacular achievements. They were mostly mentioned in the FF Announcement for this FF Strong Town Hall Zoom.

However, I think we all want to learn HOW she accomplished WHAT she did, and from Where came her MAGIC ?

I would first examine why she was awarded the “Distinguished Service Medal” by the U.S Department Treaury and the “Honorary Citizen & City’s Favorite Daughters Award” by Shanghai’s People’s Congress.

It had been explained that the “Distinguished Service Award” was for her steering the bank towards policies and practices which made development assistance more equitable, and enduring, and her key role in defining the bank’s participation in the international response to the Asian Economic Crisis of 1997-98.  

The  Shanghai “Honorary Citizen Award”- was for her bringing international technology and standards in water quality management to the Suzhou Creek environmental cleaning and revitalizing Project – most beneficial to China and to Shanghai, her Ancestral Home.

It seems to me, to accomplish what she did required: first having deep purpose and foresight / then ability to analyze complex problems – technically, economically, and diplomatically / optimizing and prioritizing various opportunities / providing persuasive policy ideas and plans / and finally leveraging her personal integrity, credibility, and charm. I think the last aspect may be the most unique about Sister Linda that we should learn from her.

Indeed, at this Zoom gathering, we can learn a lot by LISTENING closely to WHAT Sister Linda has to say, and WATCH closely on HOW she tells her stories.  I would pay close attention to her VERBAL & FACIAL EXPRESSIONS.

If we seriously wish to learn from her, we must watch her Manners and Composure and capture her Inner Spirit : her Compassion, her Dedication, her Optimism, her Constant Striving, her Pride & Modesty, and her unique Shanghai Sentimentality.

Now, Let us Watch and Listen Closely to Sister Linda.

Welcome, Sister Linda !

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BILLY’S SUGGESTION – TRY TO CAPTURE :

Why she sings ?

What she sings ?

How she sings.

Learn from her Songs

Learn from her High and Low Voice Control

Watch her eyes, lips, and body movements

Catch her Passion – Style – Effects

Confidence – Trustfulness – Optimism.

Totally void of Pretense & Arrogance !

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