Joshua Carpenter was saddened as the angry voices of his young friends and neighbors reached him through the open windows. Lori and Peter had only been married two years, and it sure sounded like the honeymoon was over.  Joshua knew money was tight for the young folks, but he wished they would pull together instead of blaming one another. It just made things harder for both of them.

   He so wanted Lori and Peter to grow and work together, as he and his wife had done.  He was 82 and his wife, Jenny, would have been 80 next week.  If only . . . Joshua’s thoughts drifted  back.  Times had been hard for them during the years, but they’d made out. He wished he could do something to help the young couple.  He wished he could tell them to be kind to one another, to cherish their time together.

   His gaze rested on the garbage can lying on its side by the street. Joshua got up from the porch rocking chair and walked slowly down the steps.  He quietly righted the can and picked up the things that had spilled. Then Joshua headed back to the porch.

   “You promised to help around the house, Peter. That’s all its been–promises!”  Lori’s voice came clearly to Joshua and his heart was heavy as he settled back in the rocker. “I took on that part-time job to earn extra money and I don’t have as much time as I used to. I’ve been trying to help.  What didn’t I do now?” Joshua could almost hear Peter sigh.

   “That garbage can!  That’s what.  That stray dog knocked it over and you promised to clean it up.” Joshua saw the curtain move as Lori came to the window. “Just look at that mess. ”  Lori’s voice trailed off. “Oh, Peter, you did clean it up.” “But Lori,”  Peter protested as he joined her at the window. “I’m sorry, Peter.  I’ve been so tired and worried lately and here I am taking it out on you. Please forgive me.”

   Joshua could see their shadows merge through the curtain.  He smiled as he watched them hug each other.  Their voice became a murmur as they slowly moved away from the window.

End

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BILLY’S COMMENTS :

Dede is wife of my good friend, Gordon Hammond. They both love to write and

belong to a Writing Club in Zephyrhills, Florida.

FROM THE FF BULLETIN : Bro. Mike King, Sister Karen( near 60 ), and Bro. Ryan Pei ( near 30 ) brought orchids to present to Sister Linda Tsao Yang ( near 90 ) on behalf of FF Fraternity for her recent presentation at our FF Strong Webinar. She cooked them a really tasty & nutritious lunch.

Sister Linda also shared a classic poem in a glass case. She suspects it may have inspired FF’s Chinese name. From what she described it seems very plausible.

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LESSONS LEARNED BY <FRIENDSHIPOLOGY.net> :

This is really a story about KINDNESS – doing good deeds in helping others who need help ( Mike’s helping Linda at the Zoom ), Gratitude -expressing heartfelt thanks with open embrace ( Linda’s inviting Mike to enjoy her home cooking ), Adding Meaning to the occasion ( Mike’s idea of having FF Fraternity present flowers to thank Linda and introduce one of our younger FF Brothers to join the occasion and share the FF Family Spirit. ), Earnest Respect (shown by Ryan’s travelling all the way from Stanford, while pursuing his MBA, holding a part time job, and buying flowers for Linda with his new bride’s help ), Making Everything Worthwhile ( Linda’s providing a special culinary treat, sharing lessons from her own life challenges, and showing unique Chinese Cultural treasures like that Orchid Poem which may have inspired FF’s Chinese name . As Ryan reported,” Linda also shared with us her Family Principles (家训), written 30 years prior in 1991, which included the following notable excerpts:

• “Be thrifty and hardworking. Don’t be greedy or vain. Neither arrogant nor meek, you must
  conduct yourself with honor and integrity.”
• “In the real world of work, you’ll do well when you commit yourself to learning as a lifelong endeavor, to enriching your experience and expertise and to holding yourself accountable for what you do.”
• “Human relationships are more often than not, the most challenging to deal with as you make your mark in society.”

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BILLY’ COMMENTS :

There is such Special Warmth in this Elder’s Caring and Sharing with the younger generations.

There is such Earnest Focus in learning from the Elder’s Wisdom by the Youngest member.

There is such Delight for the Middle Aged in seizing this rare opportunity- and allowing Magic to happen.

Billy further gathered some Post-event Thoughts & Sentiments from each of the participants:

The Yougest felt truly embraced and encouraged. Ryan wrote: ” Perhaps the most
memorable sharing that Linda gave was admitting to failing accounting at Columbia Business School, where she graduated with a master’s degree in 1948. As an economics major, she admitted to feeling unprepared for the world of business. Despite this modesty, her many accolades in public and private life proved just the opposite. From her appointment by President Clinton to serve as Executive Director to the board of Asian Development Bank in Manila from 1993 to 1999, to her run as Chair of the Asian Corporate Governance Association in Hong Kong, Linda didn’t let one bad grade keep her from reaching unbelievable heights. I can’t wait for the
next visit. Hope to visit Linda again before the year ends. “

The Middle Aged wrote about Linda : “We were treated like Family. Karen and I were struck by her lifelong commitment to public service, while maintaining a very strong adherence to her principles and integrity. Her courage in the face of adversity throughout numerous times of her life was truly impressive. She’s not physically a tall woman, but she is a true giant in spirit! We will always remember and treasure this visit.” Indeed, Karen told me emphatically again at the FF Picnic last week , “ I wish more Young Women will have an opportunity to meet Linda. “

The Elder truly had the Future Generations and F.F. Family in her heart and mind. Linda wrote :

Dear Billie,
Mike, and Ryan are Yuelin’s FF brothers; Karen his FF sister.  All family to him.
So family to me too. Very happy they liked my simple home cooking.

I appreciate their generous compliment of me.  But whatever I achieved in my life, I owe it to my mother. She gave me my life. She also taught me and taught me well that it’s not wealth nor fame  but what I make of my life that counts.  She encouraged me to commit myself to learning as a lifelong endeavor, to hold myself accountable for what I do . Above all, I must conduct myself with honor and integrity. No excuses.

My mother’s teaching has done well for me. And this is what I would like to pass on to our younger generation. 
Linda

BILLY CONCLUDED: It’s so important that we encourage each other to make special efforts to Promote and Nurture Cross-Cultural & Cross-Generational Relationships and Friendships which we shall forever remember as “ WONDERFUL GOOD FEELINGS TO BE TREASURED “.

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Billy approached Sophie on July 17, 2021

Dear Ms. James,

I was impressed by your The Astronomer and The Sea project in

today’s issue of Dezeen.

I am an 89-yr-old retired architect who still has naive questions

occasionally about what our goals are in our professional pursuits..

Lately, I have posed a question to myself: ” Can Architecture induce

compassion ? ” I find that your The Astronomer and The Sea “

seems to have a certain quality that inspires.

I love to hear your thoughts if you can spare the time to write to me.

Cheers and thanks !

Billy Lee

<https://friendshipology.net>

promoting Friendship

Sophie James repied on July 30th :

Dear Billy,

Thank you so much for getting in touch, it is amazing to know that my work has reached so far! I am so glad that you enjoyed the sample of my project – The Astronomer and the Sea – it is a project that brought me a lot of joy to work on. I have attached my final presentation in its entirety if you would like to have a look.

Throughout my three years of studying architecture, I have been amazed by its ability to open up conversations and questions such as the one posed by yourself. Compassion became a key theme in The Astronomer and The Sea – how could architecture begin to evoke an emotional response to the climate crisis? The project itself took inspiration from my dissertation essay in which I explored how events are remembered and commemorated and how spaces take on the memories of their traumas. The spaces can then become an emotional tie for those affected or a truthful insight for generations to come. This line of enquiry lead me down the path of Daniel Libeskind and his use of voids in the Jewish Museum Berlin. Bringing this thinking into my project, I incorporated void spaces which stripped back all views to focus the visitor’s eye and mind towards the sky.

A similar thread has run through many of my projects, dealing with notions of history and memory – whether that be locational or sociological memory. A previous project of mine dealt with the idea of storytelling as a means of remembrance. In short, people visiting the proposal were encouraged to write notes and memories on seeded paper which could then be ‘planted’ on a communal wall. Once the seeds within the paper had flowered, a live wall of the people’s memories and stories would appear – In a way I feel like this approach begins to induce compassion through architectural proposal, maybe the compassion is encouraged through the collective nature of remembrance. I would hope that seeing the communal live wall and the memories that had been shared would encourage others and make them feel comfortable enough to add their own memories, engaging withe the remembrance process. Whilst this maybe is not purely the architecture encouraging the compassion but rather the activity within it, the act of storytelling and the collection of memories were so integral to and embedded within the architecture that I feel one would not exist without the other. The project named ‘The Photosynthesis of Memory’ is included in my online portfolio – https://www.instagram.com/sophie.james.architecture/ – I would love to hear your thoughts.

Sorry for my delayed response, I felt I needed to give your question the time it deserved. I look forward to hearing from you,

sophie.james.architecture

Sophie James

3rd Year Architecture Student
Plymouth, UK
@soph.l.j

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The Power of Friendships:
When the UN Race to Zero asked for signatories and support from the architecture and planning community it was not out of friendship – they received few signatories. 
When Architecture 2030 asked for signatories and support for the 1.5 degC Communiqué from the architecture and planning community, we sent out a personal note to each of our friends and colleagues in our community, and every one of them signed up to demonstrate their support (see the 1.5 degC Communiqué and signatories here).  Warm regards,Ed

Edward Mazria, FAIA FRAIC Architecture 2030
p  505|988|5309 w architecture2030.org

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BILLY’S COMMENTS:

When I wrote to congratulate Ed yesterday, I also asked if he could write a few lines about Friendship in his Architecture 2030 experience. He responded instantly.

The key words in his comment were ” We sent out a personal note to each of our friends and colleagues in our community.” The POWER was indeed from PERSONAL CONNECTIONS or FRIENDSHIPS.

Ed and I were colleagues at Edward Larabee Barnes, Architects, NYC.near fifty years ago. We kept in touch only on rare occasions – last time we met was almost 20 years ago when he came to lecture at Stanford University. I have always admired his ambitions and his dedication to higher achievements with HIGH PURPOSES. It’s not at all surprising to me that he was awarded the 2021 AIA Gold Medal. My sincere congratulations to him.

The POWER in our Friendship comes from MUTUAL RESPECT and continued GOOD WILL towards each other. His ARCHITECTURE 2030 definitely provides me inspirations, and I in return will promise to help promote his Most Urgent Global Mission: CCC – Control Climate Change.

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